A Little Girl Time

I love my husband and my dogs and I really enjoy a nice quiet weekend at home with my family…..but every once in awhile I love to spend time with my girlfriends.

This weekend my daughter and I are headed to Fresno for a birthday party for one of my great friends. I haven’t seen her since her bachelorette party (I didn’t make it to the wedding) and I can’t wait to spend some time pool side with her and her family. There’s something so special about spending time with old friends.

In July I’ll be heading to Las Vegas with my friend Kat, who has been my best friend since we were in kindergarten together. We’re having a gathering of a bunch of people from our high school class and it should be a ton of fun! When Kat and I get together we have SO MUCH FUN! It often requires frequent trips to the bathroom to make sure we don’t wet ourselves from laughing so hard. There is no substitute for a friend like Kat. I’m blessed to have her!

Dinner and Shopping

I don't really mind making dinner. It isn't the "making" part that I have trouble with. I'm a pretty good cook and I have come up with some pretty tasty dinners just throwing together a bunch of stuff that seems like it would taste good together. The part I don't like is deciding. I seem to have a complete mental block when it comes to deciding what to make for dinner. I have been to the grocery store every day this week because I just get some overwhelmed with the idea of what to make for dinner. It's all I can do to decide what to have that night, let alone the next night.

Years ago, when I was younger and married to a man who was much easier to feed I would make an entire weeks menu, make my grocery list, shop on Saturday and be set for a week. Those days are LONG over!

Here's part of the problem...My husband doesn't really like carbs. I KNOW!? WHAT?? I could live on bread and pasta. So, he doesn't like rice, pasta, potatoes...everything good. He also doesn't like white meat chicken or turkey. My daughter has recently started on a health kick. She exercises every day and insists on eating whole grains, white meat, etc. So now what?? I seriously feel like buying a bag of wheat bagels, a bag of white bagels a jar of Skippy and a jar of Natural peanut butter and telling them to go for it. But alas...I must make healthy, nutritious meals that we can all sit down and enjoy together.

As I was writing this post my daughter text messaged me (I'm at work and she is at home) "Are you going to the store?" I answer "yes", she knows I am because she knows we have nothing for dinner at the house. She begs to go with me and says she will even wait outside for me so I don't have to get out of the car. Maybe she'll decide what to have for dinner. Probably not. Last night when I was in the store I text her and said "I can't make a decision about dinner!" and she text back "don't ask me!" Ahhh...harmony. I made spinach ravioli, salad and cauliflower. But in roughly 30 minutes I'm going to be standing in the grocery store again with the same dread.

The End of Furlough Friday

Almost a year ago my company started mandated furlough days. We had to take 16 hours off each calendar month but we were allowed to chose how we wanted to take that time. I chose to take 4 hours each Friday. So, for the last year I have only had to work until noon on Friday. In the beginning it was tough to get used to the cut in pay but the joy of having that 4 hours off soon over shadowed the pain of the loss of funds. Normally my daughter gets a ride home from school from another Mom who doesn't work outside the home. What a saving grace that Mom has been for us! If you're a SAHM and you give rides to a child who's Mom works, you have no idea how much she appreciates you! But on Friday, since I'm off at noon, I get to pick Nicole up and we do something fun like watch a show together or go to Starbucks and get yummy drinks. Last Friday however, we were informed that business is picking up and the furloughs have come to an end. There was a big cheer when the announcement was made. I didn't feel like cheering. I'm going to miss that free time and the time I have been spending with my daughter. But I'm glad that business is picking up. That means my job is a little more secure.

In updated news.....I went to the dentist last Thursday and GREAT NEWS! They thought I was really really special and I guess they're going to make me a Queen or something! I go back in 2 weeks for my crown. I guess that six month wait between when they said I needed to have the filling replaced and when I went again this time made a filling replacement no longer an option. Shoot!

I'm Lazy!

There I said it! I think I am the laziest person I know. I would rather sleep all weekend then do just about anything else. I LOVE TO SLEEP. I always feel bad on Sunday night that I slept away the weekend, but at the time it feels so wonderful. I should clean more, exercise a little, do fun things with my husband and my daughter, take the dogs to the dog park.....But I sleep. I'm also very overweight. The two are most probably connected, but I chose to ignore the obvious. So, I have landed myself in a catch-22. Being overweight is exhausting. Try going down to the store and picking enough bags of flour to equal 60 pounds, strap it on your body for a day and see how tired you are at the end of the day. Now, try exercising with said flour strapped to your body. Yeah...that's my life. I don't know exactly how I let it get so out of control. Well....I DO know how. I LOVE carbs! LOVE LOVE LOVE carbs. I could live on pasta and bread for the rest of my life and be perfectly content, and fat. At some point I really need to think about changing the cycle. But it's Thursday and I have my eye on a sleep filled weekend. I'll think about exercising again another day.

Pregnancy Test

My daughter and I had a wonderful Mother's Day together. We went out for lunch at Macaroni Grill and ate way too much. It was so tasty! We ate so much we didn't even want dinner. It's nice to do that occasionally. After lunch we stopped by the grocery store for a few necessary items and Nicole says to me, casually "Can we buy a pregnancy test for M?" This is someone that she has know for a few years at school, not a girl I would call her "friend" but they talk occasionally. I remained very calm. I casually said back "Is she afraid to talk to her Mom?" My daughter responded "Yes. She said if she IS pregnant she isn't going to tell her Mom until she's so big she can't hide it anymore." I'm still calm "I will buy her the test. But if she is pregnant she is going to need to see a doctor. She can't wait until she is noticeably pregnant to talk to her parents. Will you tell her that I will buy her the test if she promises that if she's pregnant she will come over to our house and discuss it?" That was the deal. So, off to school my daughter went today with a pregnancy test in her back pack. And I remained calm.

I sure hope that M isn't pregnant. I hope that she will start using protection if she continues to have sex. I hope that my daughter will remain abstinent until marriage as she has vowed to do. I hope that if she doesn't remain abstinent that she will be able to talk to me and we can deal with it together. I hope she doesn't have to text a friend and ask that friend's Mom to buy a test. Mostly, I hope that my daughter continues to trust me and know that whatever she needs to tell me, I will remain calm.

Nicole is my only child. I'm not experienced with how to parent a teenage girl. I'm not sure what the right thing to do here was. Should I have called M's Mom and told her right away, even though I've never met her? Should I have told Nicole to tell her friend that I won't buy the test? Should I call the school and tell a counselor? I don't know that there is even a "right" answer here. I made the best decision I could, based on the circumstances. My husband is a middle school counselor and he deals with this kind of thing on a regular basis. I went to him for advice and we made a decision that seemed like it was the best thing to do.

Throughout all this, I remained calm. Is that even normal?

A Home Run

My daughter is 14 years old. She has always been really bright and school has always been relatively easy for her. She skipped 3rd grade and didn't miss a beat. This year, her first year of high school, she decided she wanted to try softball. She had never played a sport before. Her first few practices were tough, she felt so much less talented then all the other girls on the team. She tossed around the idea of quitting the team, but stuck it out. When I picked her up from her very first game she was in tears. She felt so inadequate, even though she hadn't played badly. She didn't quit, she kept at it. The first few games she spent a lot of time warming the bench. Mid-way through the season some of the better players were put on academic probation and Nicole started to play every game. She has improved so much! During one game a couple of weeks ago she was hit hard in the upper arm with a line drive and managed to catch that ball before it hit the ground for a super play! She was crying from the pain and laughing from the joy all at the same time. Things have really started to look up! Last night she hit her first home run. What a moment!! I am so proud of the effort she has put in and the progress she has made. I love watching my daughter blossom.

Preparing to be A Single Mom....Again

My husband is moving to a different state next month. My daughter and I are not. Weird, huh? We aren't getting divorced or separated (in the legal sense), we're just going to live in different states. It's going to be a financial and emotional stretch, but we can do this.

There are exciting things that come with this new life. Nicole and I are moving into a smaller house. We're selling our current house and she and I will rent something in the area so she can finish high school where she started. I'm excited about getting rid of some of the "junk" we have had in our house for the last 8 years. Moving is always a great way to purge the unnecessary stuff a family accumulates. I'm excited about eating more chicken and turkey and not having my husband beg for beef. I'm excited to be able to have so much one-on-one time with my daughter for the last 3 years that she will be living at home. I'm not worried about our safety, we have dogs that are better than any fancy security system.

There are also some scary things. Will we be able to afford everything we need and occasionally something we want? I mean, I have a teenage girl, the "wants" are endless. Will we be able to find a house that will allow us to have 2 large dogs? Will the neighbors in the new house be quiet and friendly?

Mostly I'm excited. Being a single Mom again is a little scary, but I'm looking forward to this special time with my daughter. I'm so lucky she's mine!

I'm a Procrastinator

I admit it, I procrastinate.....BADLY. I have a tendency to think that I'm going to do things that I don't end up doing. One fine example is these 30-day "free trial" offers for various services on the Internet. I have memberships to so many things that I pay for every month that I haven't used since the first day of the "free trial" and yet, I don't ever cancel them before the end of the 30-days and I end up paying for things for months (or years) that I never use. Sure, I see them on my bank statement and when I do, I say to myself "I MUST stop that membership." I don't. Recently my bank was bought by another bank and so I received a new Visa/Debit card with a new account number. HA! That stopped all of those memberships. Sadly, it was by no act of my own that I now save about $85/mo.

That leads me to today's issue....a toothache. It's been almost six months since I last went to the dentist for my routine cleaning. At the time the dentist informed me that I needed to have one of my fillings replaced. I made the appointment and then something came up and I cancelled that appointment, with every intention of rescheduling. I didn't. Of course. And so, like the pain of the $85/mo I was giving away like I had all the money in the world....I now have a toothache in that tooth that I was warned about almost 6 months ago. Luckily I have an appointment scheduled for next week for my routine cleaning. Here's hoping the tooth can be saved because a root canal does not sound like fun. And I bet it'll cost me more than $85.